When I was in 2nd grade I not only knew who I was and who my friends were but who I was going to be. In 6th grade I was quite sure(if not overly confident) in whom I was and would become. Now after my freshman year of college I am not sure of who I am, who I will become or who my friends are. I say this with perhaps some exaggeration and certainly little depth, because I have accumulated many pieces of the puzzle . Despite this, I have come to conclusion that what assisted me most in this has been my fortunate opportunity to meet so many interesting and wonderful people. Certainly many others, if not all, can say this yet I feel that few would say the majority of influential people in their life were old enough to be their grandparents. I mention this to emphasize what I see to be a rather neglected aspect of our lives.

Every day,we see higher and higher gas prices. Less than 10 years ago I was in high school and a gallon of gas cost only 97 cents. It's almost 4 times that now, and who knows when it will slow down.

My life has gotten very crazy in the past week. Thanks to the financial ups and downs of freelance writing, I have taken two part-time jobs to help keep the wolf from the door. One is as the substitute children's librarian at Fuller Public Library, where I will be doing the preschool story time hour on Tuesday and Thursday mornings. I was a Montessori preschool teacher for a number of years, so it will be nice being around kids again.

The other job is in my local Shaws bakery. While I have a weakness for baked sweets, I'm not worried about facing temptation each time I punch-in on the time clock, thanks to the store's rule that you may not eat while working. (Only during break times in the employee lounge.)

My ego took a bit of a blow this weekend. I'll spare you the not-so-pretty details. Let's just say I discovered that someone close to me doesn't appreciate what I have to offer in the looks department. It stunned me because I have always been in the "pretty in spite of being fat" category my whole life, and I thought that person saw me that way. It was quite a shock to find out the opposite.

Do we let how other people see us have too much influence on how we see ourselves? I mentioned a couple of posts ago that when you lose weight, you start feeling pretty good about how you look, mainly because you feel so much better about yourself. Then something comes along, such as a photograph or a comment from another person, that brings back all of the insecurities and negative self images that you are trying to put in the past.

We just keep getting fatter, at least according to the research group the Trust for America's Health. (Just who are these people?) They found that obesity rates climbed in 31 states last year, and no state showed a decline. While New Hampshire raked pretty well (38th) and Massachusetts even better (50th!), the poor states of Mississippi, West Virginia, and Alabama came in the unglamorous numbers 1, 2 and 3.

So it would seem we just keep getting bigger, which is amazing to me when you consider the fitness and dieting crazy our society has experienced since the 1970s. It's even more amazing when you realize Americans spend an estimated $30 billion a year on diet programs and products.

Yesterday I went to the Monitor offices to have a photo taken for this Sunday's Let's Get Real column, the last monthly piece about my weight-loss journey. This was the "after" picture to show my progress in the past year. I was feeling pretty confident about myself and what I've accomplished. That is until I saw my picture on photographer Ken William's computer screen. Then the bubble burst-who am I kidding? Sure, I've lost weight, but I'm still fat. It was a slap in my ego's face.

I moped around for the rest of the day. Then today I looked back at a posting on this blog that I made on October 3, 2006 called "Doing a Happy Dance." I wrote about how excited I was to fit in a pair of black jeans that I hadn't worn in 2 1/2 years. I also wrote about a smaller pair of jeans that I couldn't wear yet but I could finally button.

What's the key to happiness? Darned if I know. However, I do know that weight loss isn't it.

All of the popular diet plans would have us believe that the key to happiness is to lose weight. I've learned a lot of lessons while changing my lifestyle this past year. Perhaps the most important is that weight loss does not equal happiness. Unfortunately, each of us will continue to face hardship and disappointment no matter what the scale says.

Last week, ABC Nightly News did a story on how tens of thousands of lives could be saved each year with just a few simple steps. For example, if people who run a high risk of heart disease take a daily aspirin, that would save 45,000 lives. If more doctors would help their patients stop smoking, another 42,000 lives would be spared. Colonoscopies would save 14,000 more people. Flu shots another 12,000 people. Just these simple steps alone could save 113,000 people each year.

This simple-step philosophy is what I've been saying for this past year. It only takes a few simple lifestyle changes to lose weight. It doesn't have to be a major production. Eat what you want and just cut back on portion sizes. Get more exercise. Accept your body's real shape instead of trying to make it into someone else. These are actually very simple concepts. You don't need books, special diet plans, or expensive exercise equipment. Let's Get Real is the epitome of simplicity.

Did anyone see the new TV show, Fat March, last night on ABC? I missed it and was curious as to what your thought of it. I'll have to try and watch next week. It will be interesting to see how it compares to The Biggest Loser.

Wow, the steamy, triple-H days of summer are here---hazy, hot and humid. These types of days are a challenge, especially for someone trying to lose weight. While I know exercise is a key component to a healthy lifestyle, I also noticed today that just walking around my yard in the late morning caused my heart to pound. After a year of exercising, I thought I was in good shape, but maybe in this weather the body has enough to do to keep cool and operating without any added exertion. My exercise will have to either wait until this evening or tomorrow morning, or I will have to head to the gym.

What lifestyle adjustments have you made to accommodate the heat? It is easy for someone who is dieting to panic at the thought of missing a workout. However, it is better to miss one than to harm yourself by pushing too much while the weather is hot. If you must get moving, be sure to hydrate yourself, not get overheated, and save the workout for cooler times of the day. But don't feel guilty if you decide to wait until tomorrow. No harm will be done, and you are better off listening to your body instead of pushing it to do something it doesn't want to do.