Choices, choices...
Every thing we do is the result of a choice. Do you believe that? Some people think and say that somebody or some thing ‘made’ them mad or that they lost their temper because something that happened ‘made’ them mad. In our litigious society we tend to blame others for our actions. We seem to thrive on law suits that are no more than the blaming game; we want to blame others for our poor or just plain stupid decisions. It’s McDonalds’ fault that I spilt my coffee all over myself and burned my legs. How dare they make is so hot! The examples can go on and on, and the sad part is that they are all true examples and not just made up stories.
We’re not victims of our circumstances, though. God has given us something that no others in the animal kingdom have; we have the ability to choose. When we speak of the animal kingdom, we generally speak of instinctual behavior. When a shark sees or smells blood in the water he must go and eat, it’s his instinct. The lion must chase down the zebra and have him for dinner, it’s his instinct.
But, I have the ability to choose. If someone mistreats me, I can choose to curse them, to hit them, to cry, or to forgive. If someone says something to me that hurts me, I can say they ‘made’ me get mad or I can say that I chose to get mad at them or I can say that I chose not to get mad at them. I can say, ‘oh, that’s just the way I am, I get mad and scream’. The kicker to that is that maybe it is the way I am, but I can choose to change.
The beauty of this is that if I control my choices then no one can ever wreck my day; unless I let them. If I’m cut off in traffic on the way to work I can curse, scream, and use ‘the finger’ and brood about it all day or I can simply choose to let them go and then go about my day and be happy.
You see, no one else can control me if I make these choices. My mood is my choice. My responses are my choice. My reactions are my choice. It’s very freeing. I wish we could teach this to our children and train them that they can choose to be happy or they can choose to be mad, either way it’s a choice. They can choose to have good attitudes or they can choose to have bad attitudes, either way it’s a choice.
The next step, beyond making our own choices, is to decide what values and guiding principals we will use as we make choices…that’s for another blog on another day.
Mike, I admire your views, and share them. It’s a pity that more do not. Because with choice comes responsibility, which so many in our society have abdicated. I hate to draw parallels, but one just has to look to New Orleans to see that many there believe that they have no choice, therefore no responsibility.
I have long seen the power of choice. You are correct in stating that you have the choice to be happy or sad, to get frustrated or not at the guy who cut you off in traffic.
Long ago, after witnessing some incidents of road rage in Manchester, I vowed that I would never allow myself to get that way. I vowed to change, and in making that change it was very freeing. It freed me to be able to react or not react, as I chose. To be happy, and to spread that happiness. To live by my choices, and accept the responsibility for my actions, good, bad or indifferent.
It’s too bad that others choose to play the ‘blame game’, when they could be making choices, taking responsibility, and living a freer, happier life.